Prognosis Irreconcilable Differences Page 5

  ‘Are you okay?’

  She took a deep breath. And then another. The pain in her chest pulled viciously with each expansion of her lungs. She turned her attention to the horizon again, desperate for the earth to right itself, for the pain to go away, for calm to return. She tuned into the steady, soothing rhythm of the ocean.

  In through the nose, out through the mouth. In through the nose, out through the mouth.

  Nathan waited a few minutes. ‘Jacq?’

  She nodded. ‘I’m fine.’

  He waited another minute. ‘You never did have that baby?’

  Jacqui gave a brittle laugh to fend off another twinge in her chest. ‘Nope.’

  ‘There must have been other men, Jacqui.’

  She looked up at him. ‘Why? Because there’s been other women for you?’

  He shook his head. ‘Because you’re a sexy woman who, from what I can remember, has a very a healthy libido.’

  He seemed so calm and collected, while inside her a hundred emotions swirled around in seething disquiet like a giant bubbling cauldron. She wanted to lash out, wanted to hurt him. ‘Oh, there have been others.’

  Nathan flinched, surprised to find her admission stung. He’d suggested it because ten years was a long time, but now it was out there the thought of another man being with her really grated.

  ‘Nobody else I wanted to have a baby with, Nate.’

  His irritation evaporated as her wounded eyes sucked him back into the past. To the monthly disappointment when her period arrived, and how devastated she’d been to find out about the PCOD which complicated her endometriosis and further blighted her fertility.

  ‘Not that you wanted to have a baby with me.’

  Her quiet statement slapped him across the face hard. The sounds of the beach faded and he became very still. ‘That’s not true.’

  Jacqui shook her head on a half-laugh, half-snort, and blinked to clear a sudden welling of tears. ‘Oh, come on, Nathan. It’s been ten years. At least be honest with yourself now. You only went along with it in that last year to placate me, and because you knew we were falling apart and it was a way to hang on. But if you think I couldn’t see the relief in your eyes each month, then you’re wrong.’

  Nathan regarded her quietly for a moment. Jacqui had always possessed an uncanny knack of seeing straight through him. She was right — he had been relieved. And simultaneously guilty. ‘It just wasn’t the right time for me.’

  Jacqui nodded. He’d been busy working his way to the top. He hadn’t wanted the distraction of a child.

  ‘You know,’ he said hesitantly, not sure how his next suggestion would be met, ‘it’s not too late. Plenty of women whose circumstances have never been advantageous are using fertility specialists to fulfil their life-long dream of having a child.’

  Jacqui blinked. She dragged her gaze away from the horizon as it pitched out of kilter. She felt as if her head was going to spin off her shoulders. If her feet hadn’t been grounded in wet, heavy sand she might well have levitated.

  This truly was surreal.

  She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She cleared her throat and tried again. ‘It’s been a decade,’ she spluttered. ‘What makes you think I still want that? God, Nate, I’m thirty-eight. I gave up on that dream years ago. I’m not the same person I was back then.’

  Nathan took a moment to study her. He had noticed the changes. Ten years ago she would have flayed him for offering his credit card to her. She certainly would have told him to stick his pseudo-blackmail attempt. And she would definitely have jumped at the opportunity to have a baby by any means.

  ‘Just a suggestion. From someone in the field.’

  Jacqui shook her head at him. ‘You still don’t get me, do you? Do you think I would bring a child into the world without the benefit of a family? A mother and a father? I wanted to be a family with you, Nate. Not just the mother of your child.’

  Nathan looked down at her, surprised at how her words clawed at his gut. A family. Something he’d always taken for granted until his father had done the unthinkable and smashed their family bond to smithereens.

  The wind blew strands of russet curls across her face, and as much as he itched to tuck them behind her ear he didn’t dare touch her. She was pretty ticked off. And then his mobile rang, and he almost kissed it as he removed it from his belt.

  A business crisis he could handle, a difficult delivery, no worries. But his ex-wife looking at him with her toffee eyes and talking about family was too confrontational.

  ‘I have to go,’ he said, flipping his phone shut a few moments later.

  ‘Then go.’

  He’d been resoundingly dismissed, but for the first time in a long time Nathan was torn. He didn’t want to be here, but he didn’t want to leave either.

  ‘For God’s sake, Nathan,’ Jacqui said, barely holding it together. ‘Go!’

  Nathan gave a terse nod. ‘See you tonight.’

  Jacqui stood for an age, staring into the vast blue yonder, before plonking herself down in the shallows. The waves sucked at her, soaking her skirt and hollowing the sand beneath her.

  She didn’t care.

  Their conversation played like a cracked record over and over in her head. Damn Nate. Damn him for pushing his way back into her life and making her want things again that she couldn’t have.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Nate got home from the office with half an hour to spare before dinner. ‘Jacqui?’

  Silence greeted him and he frowned. The stillness was ominous, and a trickle of doubt slithered up his spine. Had she bolted? She’d been upset on the beach. Angry. Maybe she’d decided it wasn’t worth the hassle. He wasn’t worth the hassle.

  He clenched his fists as the thought undermined his usual unwavering confidence. He needed her. But, more than that, after a few days in her company he was actually looking forward to seeing her again. His day at work had dragged, and he couldn’t remember the last time he’d been so unproductive.

  Yes, he’d been fighting a vague sense of disquiet for a while now, the usual thrill of walking into his office at Trent Fertility having been annoyingly absent, but it had never interfered with his productivity. Until now.

  All he’d done today was stare at the wall and think about her damn lips.

  About that kiss.

  And then, after the beach incident, he hadn’t been able to rid himself of the vision of her with a child on her hip. Or the way she had looked at him with her big toffee eyes and told him she’d never wanted a baby with anyone else.

  He hadn’t been sure how he was going to be greeted, and his pulse had thudded in anticipation the entire way up in the lift like some teenager on a first date. But he had expected her to still be here.

  ‘Jacqui?’ he called again.

  He moved through the living area, calling her name and checking the deck before ending up in her bedroom. He could hear the shower spray coming from the open en suite bathroom door and, despite knowing he should turn around and leave, his relief that she was still here was so overwhelming it banished all caution.

  He sauntered across the room until he was standing in the doorway. The frosted glass of the shower stall gave away no details, just a blur of flesh, but knowing she was here, naked and near, gave him a sense of satisfaction he doubted he’d felt in a long time.

  The desire to open the door and join her, take up where he’d left off last night, was surprising in its intensity. It had been a long time since he’d held her naked body, and hearing her splashing around was setting fire to his libido. He grasped the doorjamb to prevent the impulse becoming a reality.

  ‘Thirty minutes, Jacq.’

  Jacqueline’s hands stilled in her hair, shampoo suds streaming down her face. ‘Nathan?’

  ‘Were you expecting another man to come visit you in the shower?’

  Her pulse tripled at the flirty edge to his voice. She was excruciatingly aware that she was naked and wet, and that only
a thin panel of glass separated them. She covered her breasts, turning away from the door. ‘Get out of here,’ she spluttered, ducking her head under the shower spray.

  ‘It’s okay. I can’t see anything much.’

  The fact that he could see anything at all had her nipples growing hard beneath her palms. ‘Nate!’

  He grinned, holding up his hands. ‘I’m going, I’m going.’

  Jacqui sagged against the tiles. How did he do that? Still do that? After all this time? Turn her on with just a few words? Especially when she was still mad at him over their conversation on the beach.

  How could her body betray her in that way?

  She finished the shower in record time, threw on some clothes and partially dried her hair with the dryer, scrunching it with her hands to keep the glorious curls that corkscrewed around her head in order.

  She sauntered into the lounge with ten minutes to spare, determined to put what had happened at the beach aside and forget that he’d been watching her for who knew how long while she showered. She wasn’t here to rehash old hurts or rekindle passions. She was here to smile, look pretty, act devoted and leave with her divorce papers.

  Nathan was waiting, his back to her, admiring the view, and her stomach did a little flop at the broadness of his shoulders and the sculpted contours of his butt, displayed perfectly in tailored trousers.

  ‘I’m ready,’ she said, annoyed at the husky tremor in her usually rock-steady voice.

  Nathan turned, and despite the distance between them his thorough head-to-toe left her feeling as if he had touched her. He had the top two buttons of his shirt undone and the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and she was gripped by the urge to do a little touching of her own.

  ‘And worth the wait,’ he murmured.

  And she was. Jacqui’s individual flair for fashion was in full swing. Her kaftan-type dress somehow combined tie-dye with geometrical patterns, and with her height it gave her an Aztec priestess vibe. She wore large hoop earrings and no make-up. The V neckline hinted at a cleavage, and an intricate belt made from loops of fine gold chain and a network of what looked like coins cinched the garment in at the waist.

  ‘Great belt.’

  Jacqui looked down. ‘Thanks. I bought it at an antique market in Turkey years ago.’ She fingered the elaborate piece. ‘I loved it so much I took up belly dancing.’

  Nathan had a mental image of a veiled Jacqui dressed in harem pants, gyrating her hips and undulating her belly. He wanted to cancel dinner and eat her instead.

  Clearing his suddenly dry throat, he forced his legs to walk to the drinks cabinet and pick up her cocktail. ‘Martini?’

  Jacqueline shook her head as he advanced towards her, the drink already mixed, complete with the olive he knew she loved. ‘Are you trying to get me drunk, Nate?’

  Nathan chuckled as he drew close enough to lean in and kiss her. He smiled and handed it to her. ‘Dirty,’ he said. ‘Just the way you like it.’

  Jacqui swallowed and took the proffered drink — mainly for something to do with her hands other than yanking him closer. There was a charge in the air between them tonight, a vibe, and that wasn’t why she was here. Even if he did look so good she wanted to smash the drink against his giant glass window and drag him to the floor.

  Martinis weren’t the only thing she liked dirty.

  She took a gulp of the clear liquid. A great big one. The gin kicked in immediately. She picked up the olive and sucked on it, barely noticing the bite of vermouth as his heated gaze zeroed in on her mouth, skewering her to the spot more effectively than the toothpick through the olive.

  Oh, God. She’d told him she wasn’t going to sleep with him. And she meant it. But if they kept this up — this pseudo-sexual dance — then she was kidding herself that this night was going to end anywhere else but in his bed. If they even got that far.

  This had to stop.

  She placed the empty toothpick back in the glass and threw the rest of the martini back in one shot. ‘Shall we go?’ she asked, handing him the glass and moving away.

  Well away.

  He blinked. It took a beat or two for the mists of lust to clear from his vision. Great, they hadn’t even left yet, and he was so hard for her he was light-headed. If he kept this up he’d be brain-damaged by the end of the night.

  Nathan took a deep calming breath. ‘Sure,’ he said.

  They left the apartment and entered the lift. It ascended and dinged shortly after, and he gestured for her to precede him. ‘Now, remember, we’re newly reconciled,’ he said, moving down the hallway with her. ‘Are you sure you can carry that off?’

  He had to ask that after the olive? ‘I’ll be fine.’ She nodded.

  ‘Really?’ He stopped at Vince’s door. She was surprised to hear the sudden edge of tension lacing his voice. ‘I don’t think I can stress how important this is, Jacq.’

  That much was obvious. ‘Relax. Trust me.’

  She knew she could keep her end of the bargain. Memories of loving Nate came easily. But he was suddenly looking too tense. Too serious. She frowned. Where was Mr Sure-of-Himself?

  Shouldn’t she be the nervous one?

  If he went in there looking like this he would be the one to blow their cover, not her.

  Nathan looked at her for confirmation, his gaze falling straight down into the deep V of her cleavage and the unfettered splendour beneath. Oh, God, how was he supposed to concentrate on pulling this off when she was braless?

  ‘Jesus, Jacqui. Couldn’t you have at least worn a bra?’

  Jacqueline arched a brow, unsure who this uptight man before her was. What the hell was the matter with him? She had to do something. Fast. Smiling, she casually pushed the doorbell, turning to him.

  ‘That’s nothing.’ She took a step closer, so their bodies were touching, and raised herself slightly on her toes, pressing her mouth against his ear. ‘I’m not wearing any underwear at all.’

  Nathan felt the breath stutter to a halt in his lungs as a surge of pure, high-octane lust zinged at warp speed through his system. He pulled away slightly. ‘Jacqui...’

  His husky warning curved her lips further. She pulled his head down and slammed a kiss against his lips that she hoped would live with him way after the ink was dry on their divorce papers. His greedy response, the plunder of his tongue and the harsh sucking of his breath, told her it just might.

  Jacqueline pulled away, satisfied with the result even if naked need roared in her head, urging her to continue. Now he looked like a man who’d been in bed for a week with his lover. She turned in time for the door opening and slipped into her role.

  A maid ushered them in and Jacqui smiled to herself, dragging an unmoving Nathan in with her by the arm. Nice to know she could still bring him to his knees.

  And then it was action stations.

  There were introductions, and Jacqueline finally came face to face with Abigail Slater. The woman who wanted her husband. Abigail shook her hand politely and gave Nathan a kiss on the cheek. As her lips lingered Jacqui was hit by the sudden overwhelming urge to scratch the younger woman’s eyes out.

  The impulse to snap, back off, rose on a tidal wave of white-hot jealousy, and she clamped her mouth shut lest it spew out unchecked. What the—? She’d seen a hundred pictures of beautiful women gracing Nathan’s arm — neatly clipped out by good old Mum — and none of them had roused such instant bile.

  Sure, she’d drawn moustaches on all of them, and then used them to line the bottoms of the cages in her surgery, but she hadn’t wished any of them obliterated from the earth.

  ‘Well, now,’ Vince said. ‘I can see why Nathan’s been keeping you a secret. No wonder he looks so smitten.’

  Jacqueline laughed. She could see Abigail’s pout in her peripheral vision, and her smile widened further. ‘I’m afraid the feeling’s entirely mutual,’ she admitted, and blasted Nathan with her best hot-for-you look as she ran her palm up over his abs to the flat of his pectoral muscle.<
br />
  Nathan blinked, his brain still stuck in the no-underwear rut. His hand slid down her back and ran across her rump, searching for a tell-tale line.

  Nope. Nothing.

  He had a picture in his mind of her sans dress, wearing nothing but the damn belt that jingled with every movement.

  Christ!

  ‘Isn’t that right, Nate?’

  A slight edge in her voice brought his wandering mind back. She was staring at him with parted lips, and with a large dash of snap-the-hell-out-of-it swirling in her toffee gaze.

  Right. They had a show to put on.

  He smiled down at her and bent his head to place a loving kiss on her mouth. ‘Absolutely.’

  ‘It just seemed so sudden — didn’t it, Vince? We were only just saying that last night.’

  Jacqueline watched as Vince nodded adoringly at his wife. Abigail — pretty in a plastic gym-bunny kind of way — gave her a hard look that demanded an explanation. Luckily they’d spent some time in the chopper yesterday getting their story straight.

  Jacqui shrugged. ‘We didn’t want to put any pressure on ourselves by going public too soon. We’ve been working on this for a couple of months.’

  ‘But we didn’t want to keep it secret any longer,’ Nathan added. ‘It’s time to shout it to the world.’

  Vince laughed a great booming laugh and clapped Nathan on the back. ‘Well, then,’ he said. ‘This definitely calls for a celebration. A toast.’

  ‘Yes,’ Abigail murmured. ‘I’ll go fix us some drinks.’

  It was one of several toasts they made over the course of the evening. They dined on the balcony, overlooking a glorious ocean crowned in moonbeams by a large full moon. Waiters served them freshly shucked oysters followed by sand crab linguine.

  Vince was an absolute delight, regaling her with stories from his corporate world, talking about his travels and quizzing her about her job.

  ‘Yes,’ Abigail chimed in. ‘What are you planning on doing with your practice?’